Happy.

I'm done with this trying to recover shit.

I need to get it all off. I want my back bones back. I want my collars bones back. I want it all back.
I know ive been sinking into a dark cloud of god knows what. I couldn't think. I was really thinking about ending it all. We have alot of pils in my house that would do it.

I'm feeling clearer now. I know what I want. I want it all back.

Plan for tomorrow:
Clean house.
Dance practice.
Ab workout.
Gym.
Teach dance.
Dance class.

So three workouts in one day. Makes me very happy. And all I want us to be happy with myself again.

Re-Start

Well it looks like I'm back here again.

I struggling big time right now and tumblr just isn't cutting it when it comes to needing to vent.
I no longer know what I weight and I really don't care anymore because its all about being empty, pure, just bones. Actually that's a fucking lie. I'm terrified to weight myself. Maybe if I was thinner I would be able to do it.

I haven't purged in about a month and my last binge was last week. I'm restricting everday (even if it feels like I'm just eating normally).
Breaking into tears at dance class has become a constant thing. I feel like I can't do anything right anymore.

Now onto catching up with all your blogs.

Stay Strong, Stay Thin.
Emily.
xx