About Me

New Zealand
I used to be thin. I used to like my body. Not anymore. Emily. 18. I live to dance. Currently in New Zealand but planning on getting out shortly. Come join me on my journey to perfection. CW: 116 HW: 124 LW: 108 GW 1: 110 GW 2: 105 GW 3: 100 UGW: 95... for now.

Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Yesterday was abit of a flop. Not a really one but still a flop. I ate around 300 more calories than I had planned to. I blame cookie dough ice cream. It's so deliciously evil.

But even though I ate over my calories I had a massive surprise when I weighed myself this morning:

113 (51.4kg)

I had to weigh myself another ten times to make sure it wasn't lying. It wasn't.
It's werid though, last time i was this light my arms were tiny, I was eating almost nothing and I was so headed all the time. Hmmmm. Odd. I am exercising alot more now though. Last night I did notice how flat my stomach had gotten again. It's starting to look good, can't say the same about my thighs and my butt. Oh well, looks like I've still got a long way to go.

Food for today:
Breakfast: trim mocha
Lunch: salad
Dinner: rice wafer with low fat veggie cheese and tomato.
I have a feeling that I've brought enough coffees to get a free muffin. I might eat it. I know muffins are just packed with calories but I do have dance tonight and I went to the gym this morning.

I'm on my way to work at the moment. I missed 5 different ferries this morning. So not a good start to the day.

Love you all, stay skinny!

Sunday, March 27, 2011

Fat fuckers

Okay so fuck this shit.
I just wanna chop off all this fat.
I've tried being healthly. Eating no more than 1200 but no less than 600 calories.
But it ain't working.
I just had a little break down in front of my mirror.
I am fat.
My thighs are huge.
I have muffins on my hips.
I've lost my collar bones.
I just can't deal with this anymore.
I've tried to ignore the voices in my head but I can't resist them any longer.
Which is why I'm back here. Blogging. I've been on tumblr, but it's just not the same.

So I'm cutting down to around 300-400 cal per day with at least an hour of exercise. But I'm doing around 2 hours 5 days a week now.
I need to be thin. I would be so happy with 110 pounds (50kg). I would be the happiest girl on earth.

So tomorrow:
Trim mocha for breakfast - 140 cal
Couscous salad for lunch - 200
Rice wafer with cheese and tomato for dinner - 80

Plus I'm doing a kick boxing class before work and 1 and a half hour dance class after work.

Although today I brought 2 pairs of lee rider jeans. Both are a size 6 and fit perfectly. Size 6 (xs) is the smallest size they make. Which is odd. Because I'm back up at 124 pounds and yet I'm wearing xs?

Weird. Anyway I'm looking forward to catching up on all your blogs!