About Me

New Zealand
I used to be thin. I used to like my body. Not anymore. Emily. 18. I live to dance. Currently in New Zealand but planning on getting out shortly. Come join me on my journey to perfection. CW: 116 HW: 124 LW: 108 GW 1: 110 GW 2: 105 GW 3: 100 UGW: 95... for now.

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Willpower, please come back?

I need to stop eating. Right now. I need to stop now. Everyday I start off fine, then I say I'm only going to have lunch. But I get home and I think to myself 'if I eat I'll go to the gym'. So I let myself eat. Then I just sit infronr of the tv all night.

But I'm stopping that right this very second.

Working full time is really screwing with me. I sit down at a computer all day and yet I'm so tired. It's horrible. So I went and brought some caffine pills and energy pills yesterday. The energy ones only have 5 cal :) I'm going to try and live off a diet of salads, subway, diet coke, water and energy pills. It will work

I'm going out clubbing tomorrow night even though I have work the next morning. But that's what energy pills are for right? Hehe. And I might, I really hope I do, meet up with the boy. I really like him and even though he doesn't deserve someone like me (vain, fucked in the head, fat, possisive) I really hope something more will come from tomorrow night :)

I didn't exercise today so I'm feeling super flubby :( I wasgoing to gym in the morning, but I'm so super tired I just can't. Fml. Where has my willpower gone???

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