About Me

New Zealand
I used to be thin. I used to like my body. Not anymore. Emily. 18. I live to dance. Currently in New Zealand but planning on getting out shortly. Come join me on my journey to perfection. CW: 116 HW: 124 LW: 108 GW 1: 110 GW 2: 105 GW 3: 100 UGW: 95... for now.

Thursday, December 24, 2009

The jolly season

Jolly season?

Yeah jolly fucken fat season.
I swear I look like a fat pig right now. I've eaten so much today, I'm not even going to tell you how much. The amount of calories I've had....... Argh just thinking about it makes me want to purge. If only it was that easy......

So tomorrows Christmas day. It's going to be horrible. The amount of food I will be forced to eat! I think I might cry just thinking about it. I swear if my family buys me any candy or chocolate I will have a fit. God I know they are going to try and make me just like them - unfit, fat and over weight. It makes me sick.

Anyway boxing day = eating less than 200 cal.
27th = it's my birthday dinner so I won't eat anything apart from dinner
the rest of December? Well no fasting. Drinking water, coke zero and apple cider vinegar only. Eating as less carbs and cal's as possible - trying to stay under 200 a day. Plus gym and exercises at home.

I want to weight myself but I'm to scared. But I will on the morning of the 30th, before I go away. I hope the scales are kind. Hoping to be at 117 pounds or less!

I just watched the Victorias secerat 2009 show. Omg only the most amazing thinspo ever. Fuck I wish I looked like them. I would kill to look like them.

Anyway merry Christmas all! Hope you all have a wonderful day! But remember what we are all aiming for. Never forget.
Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels.

Stay strong.


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